As we are about to wrap up another year, I like to reflect back on the events of this year--happy, proud, and grateful moments. Time flies by, we all agree on that. That is why we should take a pause to review a small part of our lives that unfolded this past year. We often analyze our failures; we overthink what has gone wrong; and we beat ourselves over unattainable goals. On the other hand, we overlook our happy and grateful moments; we don’t pat ourselves on the back for small or big achievements; we forget the things that put a smile on our face.
The end of year is a great opportunity to reflect on past year, but also to set goals for next year. I am not talking about work-related goals--we are already good at that, I mean self-related goals: goals that only matter to you, things you do just out of pure joy, goals you attach meaning to. I chose to share my personal achievements of this year to cherish good parts of what became a recent history and to nudge myself to set goals for the coming year. With setting goals, I am more conscious of time, of things of value to me, and time goes by a bit slower.
I hope you take a similar approach this year: look back on the past year to find traces of your happiness and bridge your “personal” gap between past and today by setting “achievable” goals for next year.
Reading:
Reading has always been a part of my life, but I realized that I turned my back on books--nonacademic books, in the past years. I missed reading regular books, but I did not have the motivation to rekindle my reading journey. So, I set a goal of reading 12 books this year. I finished reading 29 books (!), and I am hoping to get 30 by the end of this year. I read variety of books; I learned; I laughed; and I cried. I feel a little bit closer to my authentic self. If you'd like to get ideas about what to read, head to my Goodreads account (goodreads.com/gokcekahvecioglu), or just read my posts about some of the books I read this year:
- https://www.gokcekahvecioglu.com/blog/book-club-coming-of-age-stories,
- https://www.gokcekahvecioglu.com/blog/a-midsummer-s-dream
I loaned most of the books from the library, so it is economically viable this way to read as much as you want. Or swap books with your friends!
Running:
Two years ago, I left a 5K run in the middle of it; I did not train for it and I thought I could give it a go. Ten minutes into race, I was exhausted, dizzy, and my heart was pounding. I sucked at running, or I convinced myself that I sucked at running. I love a challenge though: I joined a running club, at first for a 5K training program, that gradually builds your cardio strength. Every Sunday we met with the members of the club, and ran together along the lake. The lesson I learned from my transition from ‘I hate running or I am not good at running’ to ‘I love running’ is “start easy, then build up your strength little by little.” You cannot show up at a race, and expect from yourself to just do it. For instance, we started with one-minute running, five-minute walking exercise. Eventually we found ourselves running for 30 minutes. At the end of the training program, I completed my first 5K run (Advocate Health Run). We still meet with the group every Sunday morning and run for 30 minutes, even when it is minus degrees in the winter. Every time I run 30 minutes I am impressed by myself. This girl who feels like fainting 10 minutes into running now can run 30 minutes, and I am very proud of this girl!
Travel:
I interned at United Airlines this fall, and it came with amazing perks--one of them being free standby tickets for me and Metin. I used this opportunity every weekend to visit the places I wanted to go for some time. Even before my internship, we did some traveling: Highway 1 road trip, attending US Open Tennis tournament the week before quarter finals (Djokovic, Serena Williams, Zverev, Sharapova). This two had been on our list for so long, we finally invested in it. During UA internship, we visited Hawaii, Colorado (Snowmass, Rocky Mountain National Park), twice because it is our favorite state), Lake Tahoe, Charleston, New Orleans, White National Forest (Maine, Hampshire), San Diego. After the internship, we continued with visiting the Great Smoky National Park. All these trips hopefully will turn into a blog post soon.
My own blog:
I talked about creating my own blog with my close friends for so many years. I never had the guts to start it. I thought it won't be interesting enough, good enough, etc. Sharing one's own thoughts brings up vulnerability. This year, I chose to be vulnerable and open, and that is when the change starts to happen. I am so proud of myself for choosing to explore my creative side.
Volunteering:
I started volunteering at Senior Connections in 2017. Since then, I became best friends with my senior match, JoAnn; we see each other every week and share everything with each other. She is awesome and she brings happiness into my life. Our friendship drew attention at Senior Connections; and I was invited to give two public speeches this year to share our story; and one was for fundraising. I am so happy that our genuine and true friendship inspires volunteers and benefactors. To read more on our friendship, go to https://www.gokcekahvecioglu.com/blog/ageless-friendship.
Therapy:
I now know my mental health is as important as my physical health. Where I came from,
therapy is for crazy people, and asking for help is shameful. How wrong it is! Our brains are programmed via heavy messages from our culture, religion, family that we believe in hurtful things. The most revolutionist act you can take on is to truly love yourself. Therapy is helping me take steps on my self-love journey. I highly recommend it to anyone.
With an eye towards the year behind me, I will now sit and think what new ways can bring joy to my personal journey this year, and what I would like to carry on to next year. Now it is your turn.
Happy new year!
Cheers,
Gokce
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